Yippee, it's spring break! I'm a little shocked I'm still alive. Between the 252 paper, genetics test, orgo test, genetics paper, orgo paper and countless 252 studies (and redos!) I wasn't planning on making it to spring break! Still not entirely sure how I did...lots and lots of coffee?
Seeing Kocher tomorrow. Because, really, what would break be if I didn't see him at least once? haha... PT is thinking that he'll be happy that I've made at least some progress but probably not so happy that things still aren't really all that much better. I can't say I'm entirely thrilled myself. Nor is Kathi, who I think would want to kill me if she could figure out who this "Megan H." character actually was...
Lefty is (still) doing fab. Balance is finally coming back and I'm getting a little bit more control over my turnout. Extensions are slowly climbing back up there. I can whack it up there in grand battements and such but holding it anywhere over 90 just doesn't work out so well. But it'll get there...eventually.
Righty is continuing to not get much better or much worse. It's a shit ton stronger than it was prior to starting up the latest round of PT but it's still not exactly a happy camper, especially when it hasn't been worked on within the past two or three days...like right now. We'll see what Kocher has to say about it tomorrow...
Sunday, March 15, 2009
Saturday, February 21, 2009
It's February.
Almost March, actually.
I was thinking about it and realized that Mr. Lefty will be 6 months post-surgery in about a week. Wow. Time flies. I've been dancing again for almost 3 months now, the same amount of time I was out for. So I've got no more excuses--I should be just about back to where I was. I feel like I am--I'm not hesitating anymore, I'm attacking things again, I finally got falling out of my system (in the ballet res auditions of course but at least it's out of my system now...), and I'm feeling good. The only thing I'm still struggling with really is holding my turnout and getting my extensions back up there--it was a good 6 months before surgery though that nothing was going higher than degage and it's only with this surgery that I have close to 90 degrees of rotation on the left, so I'm sure it will come with time. That and my balance on the left...we were doing partnered pirrouettes the other day in pointe class and I couldn't turn right because my balance was such a mess on the left leg, so I had to be a lefty turner. It better come with time.
It really feels close to 100%, as close to 100% as I think it ever will and ever could be. I sometimes forget that I ever even had that surgery. Then I see the scars and I remember or just get really confused for a second before remembering, and then I just feel like an idiot.
Mr. Righty is still far from fantastic. I see Kocher in a couple of weeks, hoping he'll have some idea of where to go next. I've been in PT again for a few weeks now and, while they've yet to give up on me, I'm about to give up on myself. I've been dealing with this for too long. My psoas is still angry as all hell and the cortisone shot didn't help that. It got rid of the nasty pinching feeling inside the joint but my psoas is still not a happy camper. PT has tried stretching it but, when you're so flexible already, it's hard to stretch things. We've tried strengthening it but anything that really works it causes it to catch and snap and get really sore. They've tried taping it which helps but only until the tape falls off. I don't know, I'm kind of ready to just give up on it for the time being. It doesn't bother me too much once I get warm in class, it's after class that I really pay for it and for the first few exercises at the barre that I really hate it. I'm also still scared to land on it, because it feels so similar to how it did. But I can deal with it and it's not getting any worse. We'll see how long I can put up with this.
I was thinking about it and realized that Mr. Lefty will be 6 months post-surgery in about a week. Wow. Time flies. I've been dancing again for almost 3 months now, the same amount of time I was out for. So I've got no more excuses--I should be just about back to where I was. I feel like I am--I'm not hesitating anymore, I'm attacking things again, I finally got falling out of my system (in the ballet res auditions of course but at least it's out of my system now...), and I'm feeling good. The only thing I'm still struggling with really is holding my turnout and getting my extensions back up there--it was a good 6 months before surgery though that nothing was going higher than degage and it's only with this surgery that I have close to 90 degrees of rotation on the left, so I'm sure it will come with time. That and my balance on the left...we were doing partnered pirrouettes the other day in pointe class and I couldn't turn right because my balance was such a mess on the left leg, so I had to be a lefty turner. It better come with time.
It really feels close to 100%, as close to 100% as I think it ever will and ever could be. I sometimes forget that I ever even had that surgery. Then I see the scars and I remember or just get really confused for a second before remembering, and then I just feel like an idiot.
Mr. Righty is still far from fantastic. I see Kocher in a couple of weeks, hoping he'll have some idea of where to go next. I've been in PT again for a few weeks now and, while they've yet to give up on me, I'm about to give up on myself. I've been dealing with this for too long. My psoas is still angry as all hell and the cortisone shot didn't help that. It got rid of the nasty pinching feeling inside the joint but my psoas is still not a happy camper. PT has tried stretching it but, when you're so flexible already, it's hard to stretch things. We've tried strengthening it but anything that really works it causes it to catch and snap and get really sore. They've tried taping it which helps but only until the tape falls off. I don't know, I'm kind of ready to just give up on it for the time being. It doesn't bother me too much once I get warm in class, it's after class that I really pay for it and for the first few exercises at the barre that I really hate it. I'm also still scared to land on it, because it feels so similar to how it did. But I can deal with it and it's not getting any worse. We'll see how long I can put up with this.
Monday, January 26, 2009
Right, and about that
So it's the end of January. Back at school for about 24 hours, classes starting tomorrow. If this semester doesn't kill me, I'm not really sure what will.
MWF we've got genetics (on Monday it's twice!), orgo, ballet, riding, and pointe class. 9:30-2:30, 'cept for Monday when I've got genetics from 3:30-4:20 too. TuTh we've got dance comp, modern (115 AND 116!), and either orgo or genetics lab 8:30-4:30 solid. Fun stuff. But by some crazy twist of fate, it's only 15 credits. Yea. Not cool.
On Friday, my right hip had the pleasure of being on the receiving end of a cortisone injection. 7th time I've had a large needle of some sort or another placed into my hip joint. 5th time for righty. Right, and I've had three surgeries too. WTF. Kocher had planned to knock me out for it "because people usually find it really painful, especially when he's doing both the joint and the psoas" but I talked him out of it. He agreed that if I'd had 5 arthrograms and a previous steriod injection and wasn't begging to be knocked out for this one, I'd do just fine. Pretty much called me a bamf after the fact. I believe his exact phrasing was "What do you do...eat NAILS for breakfast?! You didn't even flinch!" Yup, that's right, nails for breakfast and tacks for snacks. No, not really, my standards for pain have just changed alot over the past few years. And lidocaine is freaking AMAZING.
Umm...so. Waiting for that to start kicking in. Feeling considerably less gimpy today than I did the past few days though so hopefully it'll be good to go by tomorrow. Would also appreciate it if his signature would scrub off my leg. I'm not entirely sure it was necessary to sign it at all, considering I was awake and could have just been like "yo, wrong leg" (though I'm sure lefty wouldn't have complained). I'm even less sure that it was necessary to sign it with a freaking permanent pen. I don't seem to remember it taking this long to scrub off after surgeries. It's totally going to show through my tights if I can't get it to scrub off by Wednesday. haha. That'll be a good thing to try and explain. I legit exfoliated my thigh this morning in the shower with all sorts of face wash...and it didn't really go much of anywhere. Whatevs.
Have to haul my (seemingly perpetually crippled) ass to PT again starting in two weeks. I guess I was supposed to start next week, didn't get that memo until after the fact so what can ya do. I'm too embarassed to go back to the place I was at because I was all "oh, I'm done with that now" before break and, well, obvi, I'm not. I probs could have gotten an appointment there, but, for the reasons discussed earlier, that's not going to happen. So I'm going some place down the street. And i'll be hauling ass there after classes. Fun. My favorite pasttime. Right. lolz.
Took class like mad crazy over break. Trying to get myself into shape. I'm not convinced. Mary seems to think I'm looking better but she's also the sweetest thing in the world. Auditions are in like 2 weeks, idk. Need to get in shape again ASAP. I've been saying that for quite some time. Can't believe it's already been 5 months since surgery. I've still got a long way to go.
MWF we've got genetics (on Monday it's twice!), orgo, ballet, riding, and pointe class. 9:30-2:30, 'cept for Monday when I've got genetics from 3:30-4:20 too. TuTh we've got dance comp, modern (115 AND 116!), and either orgo or genetics lab 8:30-4:30 solid. Fun stuff. But by some crazy twist of fate, it's only 15 credits. Yea. Not cool.
On Friday, my right hip had the pleasure of being on the receiving end of a cortisone injection. 7th time I've had a large needle of some sort or another placed into my hip joint. 5th time for righty. Right, and I've had three surgeries too. WTF. Kocher had planned to knock me out for it "because people usually find it really painful, especially when he's doing both the joint and the psoas" but I talked him out of it. He agreed that if I'd had 5 arthrograms and a previous steriod injection and wasn't begging to be knocked out for this one, I'd do just fine. Pretty much called me a bamf after the fact. I believe his exact phrasing was "What do you do...eat NAILS for breakfast?! You didn't even flinch!" Yup, that's right, nails for breakfast and tacks for snacks. No, not really, my standards for pain have just changed alot over the past few years. And lidocaine is freaking AMAZING.
Umm...so. Waiting for that to start kicking in. Feeling considerably less gimpy today than I did the past few days though so hopefully it'll be good to go by tomorrow. Would also appreciate it if his signature would scrub off my leg. I'm not entirely sure it was necessary to sign it at all, considering I was awake and could have just been like "yo, wrong leg" (though I'm sure lefty wouldn't have complained). I'm even less sure that it was necessary to sign it with a freaking permanent pen. I don't seem to remember it taking this long to scrub off after surgeries. It's totally going to show through my tights if I can't get it to scrub off by Wednesday. haha. That'll be a good thing to try and explain. I legit exfoliated my thigh this morning in the shower with all sorts of face wash...and it didn't really go much of anywhere. Whatevs.
Have to haul my (seemingly perpetually crippled) ass to PT again starting in two weeks. I guess I was supposed to start next week, didn't get that memo until after the fact so what can ya do. I'm too embarassed to go back to the place I was at because I was all "oh, I'm done with that now" before break and, well, obvi, I'm not. I probs could have gotten an appointment there, but, for the reasons discussed earlier, that's not going to happen. So I'm going some place down the street. And i'll be hauling ass there after classes. Fun. My favorite pasttime. Right. lolz.
Took class like mad crazy over break. Trying to get myself into shape. I'm not convinced. Mary seems to think I'm looking better but she's also the sweetest thing in the world. Auditions are in like 2 weeks, idk. Need to get in shape again ASAP. I've been saying that for quite some time. Can't believe it's already been 5 months since surgery. I've still got a long way to go.
Saturday, December 13, 2008
I'm a flakesauce.
My reasons:
1. I never update this thing.
2. I keep having schools send me transfer info but I'm way too lazy to think about filling anything out.
3. I'm riding next semester instead of taking pointe class regularly.
So I saw Kocher way back on December 1st and he turned me loose. Basically, Hinton is a crackpot. My MRI was spotless; I just have an inflamed iliopsoas and he's got me popping enough ibuprofen in the hopes of calming it down that I can feel my liver crying. But I'm done with that tomorrow (?...again, I'm a flakesauce). I think its helping but I can definitely tell when it's wearing off.
But I'm dancing again. It feels awesome. I haven't been able to go through passe on both legs for three freaking years! It's so bizarre! And not having to remember to be careful about either one--I can finally remember combinations again! Well...sort of; my memory is shot from the time off. Righty gets a little angry when I push the develope a la second and devant too much (but we're talking when I'm pushing for things decently over 90, in the past I couldn't go past 45); lefty I can feel ramming into scar tissue when I push the turnout too much--but I can tell it's all temporary; I'm finally going to GET BETTER. I have to get my ass back into shape though. Dance major review is in early Feb and apparently I may be in danger. I guess they finally realized that, though next semester will be my 4th here, it will only be my second dancing. And apparently that's not cool for a dance major.
The other exciting news is that I'm riding next semester. I know that I quit in a rather irrational and rash decision so it only seems right that my decision to start again would be equally irrational and rash. Since Kocher was cool with it, I figured what the heck and set up an evaluation ride and all that fun stuff. None of the lesson times really fit in my schedule but I figured it didn't hurt to see. And the head instructor was really nice. So I decided that having pointe three times a week is rather unnecessary and it wouldn't hurt to just take it as an audit so I could ride instead. Yea...Again, flakesauce.
Finals suck.
The end.
1. I never update this thing.
2. I keep having schools send me transfer info but I'm way too lazy to think about filling anything out.
3. I'm riding next semester instead of taking pointe class regularly.
So I saw Kocher way back on December 1st and he turned me loose. Basically, Hinton is a crackpot. My MRI was spotless; I just have an inflamed iliopsoas and he's got me popping enough ibuprofen in the hopes of calming it down that I can feel my liver crying. But I'm done with that tomorrow (?...again, I'm a flakesauce). I think its helping but I can definitely tell when it's wearing off.
But I'm dancing again. It feels awesome. I haven't been able to go through passe on both legs for three freaking years! It's so bizarre! And not having to remember to be careful about either one--I can finally remember combinations again! Well...sort of; my memory is shot from the time off. Righty gets a little angry when I push the develope a la second and devant too much (but we're talking when I'm pushing for things decently over 90, in the past I couldn't go past 45); lefty I can feel ramming into scar tissue when I push the turnout too much--but I can tell it's all temporary; I'm finally going to GET BETTER. I have to get my ass back into shape though. Dance major review is in early Feb and apparently I may be in danger. I guess they finally realized that, though next semester will be my 4th here, it will only be my second dancing. And apparently that's not cool for a dance major.
The other exciting news is that I'm riding next semester. I know that I quit in a rather irrational and rash decision so it only seems right that my decision to start again would be equally irrational and rash. Since Kocher was cool with it, I figured what the heck and set up an evaluation ride and all that fun stuff. None of the lesson times really fit in my schedule but I figured it didn't hurt to see. And the head instructor was really nice. So I decided that having pointe three times a week is rather unnecessary and it wouldn't hurt to just take it as an audit so I could ride instead. Yea...Again, flakesauce.
Finals suck.
The end.
Saturday, November 8, 2008
Are we for cereal?
I saw Dr. Hinton on Tuesday.
Surprise surprise, he wants to schedule a cortisone injection before I go home for Thanksgiving and see Kocher. I don't have time for that right now--I have 2 lab papers, 5 exams, and 2 quizzes before Thanksgiving in addition to having to declare a major and register for courses. I don't have time to haul my crippled ass into downtown Baltimore, wait around for a bit, and then have the injection. I just don't have time for that kind of shit. AND I kind of want to see Kocher first, or at least hear from him (spoke with his PA on Wednesday night...still waiting to hear back) before I do this. I expressed this concern to Hinton who feels like we might as well just do it now but, yeah, not going to happen.
The highlight of my visit, aside from the fact that his office was running an hour and a half late (to which everyone in the waiting room was freaking out about; clearly they've never experienced Children's!! I'm psyched if I get out of there in any less than 3 hours!) and I had to sprint both to the bus from Orgo lab and then from the bus to get to music, was when he dropped the "open surgery" bomb on me. I was like "WHAT?! are you freaking serious?!" In his funny little Southern-but-not-quite accent he explained to me the whole procedure and how they'd be able to clean out any bone spurs and/or residual impingement. No freaking way. No matter how you slice it (no pun intended), I'm not planning for another surgery at this point--scope or open! And there's no way in hell that I'd have it done in Baltimore. Not going to happen. So I'm waiting to hear back from Kocher and seeing what he wants me to do.
And, since misery loves company, Mr. Lefty has been complaining lately too. I think it's probably because we backed off of it in PT a bit. It's definitely tendonitis-y feeling though, nothing horrbily alarming or really all that unexpected--Righty pulled this same BS last year at about the same point.
I've got quite the marathon sprint to Thanksgiving ahead of me though. I'm really hating this semester in terms of course load. Next semester should be nice though--I'm only going to be taking 15 credits (and only 1 audit!!) as opposed to the 18 I've had for the past two (and last spring it was 18 + 3 audits!); just orgo, genetics, and a bunch of dance.
Surprise surprise, he wants to schedule a cortisone injection before I go home for Thanksgiving and see Kocher. I don't have time for that right now--I have 2 lab papers, 5 exams, and 2 quizzes before Thanksgiving in addition to having to declare a major and register for courses. I don't have time to haul my crippled ass into downtown Baltimore, wait around for a bit, and then have the injection. I just don't have time for that kind of shit. AND I kind of want to see Kocher first, or at least hear from him (spoke with his PA on Wednesday night...still waiting to hear back) before I do this. I expressed this concern to Hinton who feels like we might as well just do it now but, yeah, not going to happen.
The highlight of my visit, aside from the fact that his office was running an hour and a half late (to which everyone in the waiting room was freaking out about; clearly they've never experienced Children's!! I'm psyched if I get out of there in any less than 3 hours!) and I had to sprint both to the bus from Orgo lab and then from the bus to get to music, was when he dropped the "open surgery" bomb on me. I was like "WHAT?! are you freaking serious?!" In his funny little Southern-but-not-quite accent he explained to me the whole procedure and how they'd be able to clean out any bone spurs and/or residual impingement. No freaking way. No matter how you slice it (no pun intended), I'm not planning for another surgery at this point--scope or open! And there's no way in hell that I'd have it done in Baltimore. Not going to happen. So I'm waiting to hear back from Kocher and seeing what he wants me to do.
And, since misery loves company, Mr. Lefty has been complaining lately too. I think it's probably because we backed off of it in PT a bit. It's definitely tendonitis-y feeling though, nothing horrbily alarming or really all that unexpected--Righty pulled this same BS last year at about the same point.
I've got quite the marathon sprint to Thanksgiving ahead of me though. I'm really hating this semester in terms of course load. Next semester should be nice though--I'm only going to be taking 15 credits (and only 1 audit!!) as opposed to the 18 I've had for the past two (and last spring it was 18 + 3 audits!); just orgo, genetics, and a bunch of dance.
Sunday, November 2, 2008
Introducing Annie! and other things....
My 8 year old puppy Willy died two weeks ago. Given that my family copes with the loss of a pet by getting a new one, we've just adopted Annie--a 6 month old little girl. She arrived yesterday, all the way from Indiana!! I wanted to go home but, with $14.46 in my bank account, I couldn't even afford the China bus. Anyways, here she is!
So of course I had to go to Petco today to get her a new girly collar, some fun toys, and some toys for Abby so that she doesn't feel totally neglected. I'm spoiling her rotten before we even meet!
Since we were already at Petco, we also popped into Target for some clearance Halloween candy....Jess and I each walked out with $10 worth. So basically we've got $40 worth of Halloween candy in our room right now. This is bad. I'm dancing again in less than a month. I have to wear a leotard in less than a month. Not going to be a pretty sight...
Tuesday will be 9 weeks out from surgery, 4 to go until I see Kocher. Tuesday is also the day I go back to see Dr. Hinton down here to further discuss the fate for my right hip--the steroids didn't work. I don't even know what I want to hear. I know that whatever it is, it can't be good. The lesser of all the evils at this point is probably that I've managed to give myself a really nice case of psoas tendonitis/bursitis--though that doesn't really explain the pinching and the catching that's been going on. So it's more likely that it's another labral tear--bad news bears. Needless to say, I'm freaking out.
So of course I had to go to Petco today to get her a new girly collar, some fun toys, and some toys for Abby so that she doesn't feel totally neglected. I'm spoiling her rotten before we even meet!
Since we were already at Petco, we also popped into Target for some clearance Halloween candy....Jess and I each walked out with $10 worth. So basically we've got $40 worth of Halloween candy in our room right now. This is bad. I'm dancing again in less than a month. I have to wear a leotard in less than a month. Not going to be a pretty sight...
Tuesday will be 9 weeks out from surgery, 4 to go until I see Kocher. Tuesday is also the day I go back to see Dr. Hinton down here to further discuss the fate for my right hip--the steroids didn't work. I don't even know what I want to hear. I know that whatever it is, it can't be good. The lesser of all the evils at this point is probably that I've managed to give myself a really nice case of psoas tendonitis/bursitis--though that doesn't really explain the pinching and the catching that's been going on. So it's more likely that it's another labral tear--bad news bears. Needless to say, I'm freaking out.
Saturday, October 25, 2008
So, about that...
As we can tell, I tend to forget about this thing. But in times like these where my procrastinating tendencies prevail (lab paper for cells, orgo take home, and french compositions oh my!), we can see where my priorities fall...
I had the surgery. Eight weeks ago on Tuesday. Mr. Lefty is doing really crazily well--if the scars weren't so red and lovely, I'd tell you it couldn't have ever happened. The biggest perk is that I gained about 10 degrees of turnout this time around which means that for the first time EVER I'll have an even first position. That is if I can ever figure out how to actually use those last 10 degrees...it's the only spot that I'm rather laughably weak in at the moment.
Righty isn't doing so hot. Actually, Righty is doing alot like Lefty was at this time last year. As in they think I have a labral tear. They being Kocher, guy Kocher sent me to in Baltimore, and multiple PTs. In case anyone is keeping score, that'd be 3 tears for the right and 1 for the left. Hinton, the guy Kocher sent me to, put me on a kickass dose of Naproxen for 10 days which did pretty much nothing. So he then stuck me on a Medrol dose pack--aka steriods--for 6 days. I'm at the end of day 5 and, big surprise, nada. I think this means I get a cortisone injection which I'm kind of not sure I'm cool with.
I'm 4ish weeks away from my next visit with Kocher, the one at which he'll hopefully turn me loose to head back to ballet. With Righty the way it is though, I'm not sure how cool he'll be with that or really want the plan is at this point. Hinton says an MRI will be pretty darn useless since it's already had 2 surgeries and I've pretty adamently declared that I'm in no hurry to have a 4th hip surgery before my 21st birthday, particularly one on Mr. Righty. I guess will just have to see how the cortisone works? At any rate, I've already scheduled my flight back a day later so I can go to ballet class that night. I'm a bamf, can't you tell?
I had the surgery. Eight weeks ago on Tuesday. Mr. Lefty is doing really crazily well--if the scars weren't so red and lovely, I'd tell you it couldn't have ever happened. The biggest perk is that I gained about 10 degrees of turnout this time around which means that for the first time EVER I'll have an even first position. That is if I can ever figure out how to actually use those last 10 degrees...it's the only spot that I'm rather laughably weak in at the moment.
Righty isn't doing so hot. Actually, Righty is doing alot like Lefty was at this time last year. As in they think I have a labral tear. They being Kocher, guy Kocher sent me to in Baltimore, and multiple PTs. In case anyone is keeping score, that'd be 3 tears for the right and 1 for the left. Hinton, the guy Kocher sent me to, put me on a kickass dose of Naproxen for 10 days which did pretty much nothing. So he then stuck me on a Medrol dose pack--aka steriods--for 6 days. I'm at the end of day 5 and, big surprise, nada. I think this means I get a cortisone injection which I'm kind of not sure I'm cool with.
I'm 4ish weeks away from my next visit with Kocher, the one at which he'll hopefully turn me loose to head back to ballet. With Righty the way it is though, I'm not sure how cool he'll be with that or really want the plan is at this point. Hinton says an MRI will be pretty darn useless since it's already had 2 surgeries and I've pretty adamently declared that I'm in no hurry to have a 4th hip surgery before my 21st birthday, particularly one on Mr. Righty. I guess will just have to see how the cortisone works? At any rate, I've already scheduled my flight back a day later so I can go to ballet class that night. I'm a bamf, can't you tell?
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